me and my moons

The Moon

In both of my favorite “go-to” decks, I find The Moon to be the most aesthetically/artistically beautiful card.

To me, She represents visions and illusions, madness, genius and artistic inspiration. Though She has a tendency to get caught up in Her fears of hidden enemies, lost in the wildernesses of Her mind, or avoid the world through self-destructive behaviors when in dark places, She is at her best when She engages with and trusts Her own genius, mental breakthroughs, astonishing creativity, powerful magick, and intuition. The Moon is incredibly creative and psychic, and Her vision provides great clarity, if you can only discern it from the darkness within and around her. She is not terribly grounded and as such Her judgment is not always trustworthy, but Her intuition is remarkably accurate, and She is more whole trusting of it than any external logic. Even though Her intuition can lead to loneliness; as one so eccentric, Her brilliance illuminates the darkness around her, often overpowering the light of the Stars She is situated amongst.

I’m a non-binary gender fluid, fluid queer witch. (They/them/their are my pronouns, please!) However, I was born into a family of Roman Catholics whose “religion” is more like habitual ritual devoid of personal spiritual agency. Though I’d always sensed a spiritual void within myself (I’d ascribed to heterosexuality/ism for 23 years before realizing my queer identities fairly easily in comparison), it took me a long time to come to terms with my spirituality, and reconcile all of its many facets with my queerness.

Non-binary genders aren’t widely accepted here. Queer sexuality is for the most part, but I’m usually in flux with my gender in some way, which seems to baffle many people, especially those who can’t even understand binary trans experiences on a visceral level. Addtionally, I flux polysexual and grey romantic. So all of those aspects of my identity makes taking me and my intentions seriously a bit of a challenge for many people in my life who naively ascribe to the idea that we can generally understand others’ experiences, particularly the falsehood that there is some kind of [secular] “universal” human experience.

I was blessed/cursed with the empathic gift. It teaches me that no two people on this earth are ever able to have full understanding of each others experiences; in short, empathy does not exist, not really. (As an empath, I’ve learned that I can only ever sense WHAT emotion someone feels, not HOW they feel it or WHY they are feeling that way.) This realization reminds me that no matter how I express understanding for another’s situation, it is inherently sympathetic rather than empathetic. Conflating the two causes disjunction with the people in my life.

It is in these respects that I most identify with The Moon. Like Her, I am not always grounded, and sometimes have an alarming tendency to exercise poor judgment. Like Her, my intuition is remarkably accurate, especially in regards to my empathic gifts. But I often struggle to remember that I need to respect what people tell me of their feelings and thought processes, and take them at face value. When I lose my grip on that, I can slip into an overpowering personality that often pushes away the people I want to draw in most, much as The Moon’s brilliance can overpower the brightness of the Stars, especially on clear nights when She is Full.

(Pictured Moon cards on either side of me are from Quantum Tarot 2.0 on the left, and Revelations Tarot on the right.)

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